Monday, 7 June 2010

Psychological barriers!

I'll make no bones about it, since moving to London my lifestyle has become lax, very, very, very lax indeed, to the point where I've lost my old physique and have ballooned to 18 stones I kid ye not! Too much nice food and alcohol mixed with complete inactivity, a couch potato, it's terrible, I know. Thankfully I've inherited my father's genes so I carry the weight 'well' with being broad shouldered and all that. However Phil took a photo of me at the weekend that gave me a wake up call, just like all those years ago when an old friend, Jessica Shepherd, took a photo of me in my home town that spurred me to get the weight off. Not impressed with myself, at all!

I have been meaning to join a gym down here for absolutely ages but nearly all of them were charging the earth and then some, so sod that! Thankfully due to the 'crunch' this has changed and memberships have now dropped to a respectable level. So, the bullet has been bitten, I have joined the Crystal Palace Sports Centre, huzzah! Just been back swimming for the first time in years, it's a 50m pool and you most definitely 'feel' it! I managed 500 metres which was good for a first timer, so to speak, absolutely breathless after each length though :(

One of the biggest barriers to overcome is the psychological one. When you're fat you have a really low self-esteem (not speaking for anyone else here but myself), and you need to overcome this hurdle. I mean you're going to be walking around in a pair of swimming trunks and nothing else, it's bloody frightening you know! There's this mental picture of everyone there having perfect bodies and all that which, when you get there and get changed, you realise is complete bollocks! I'd say a tiny 10% there are the 'serious crew', whereas the rest of them are just the same as me, over weight and wanting to do something about it! So now I've been for a swim, and overcome the first, and indeed biggest hurdle, I feel MUCH better for it and will be going back to try for 600m tomorrow night. My gym induction is on Wednesday evening and I'm really looking forward to that. I loved going to the gym at Newcastle and miss it a great deal. Once I get into the right frame of mind I can become quite obsessive about it, I'm hoping to get back into that mind set again.

It's online shopping time this evening for a few more pairs of swimming trunks and hoping I can find a pair of prescription swimming goggles from somewhere too as with being short sighted it's a pain squinting when swimming. I'm a head-above-the-water-person-doing-breast-stroke at the moment and want to change that, I just don't like chlorine in my eyes all of the time for some reason.

Now, it's confession time... I felt like a right plonker when trying to get into the centre via the fast track machines that scan a bar code on the membership card. I was stood there wondering why it wouldn't work, several times I tried, both machines, each time it failed, completely flummoxed by it. Went to the main desk and explained about the card problems where it was pointed out I was trying to get into the sports centre by using my disabled person's cinema card!!! God strewth, must have been a long day at work for me today!

Next hurdle is trying to balance my food and drink intake out. I love chocolate, I love cakes and biscuits, crisps and big wholesome 'Northern' meals, and alcoholic drinks, it's all very naughty and very bad but oh so yummy at the same time! *Sighs*. So, the plan is to only drink at weekends and cut back, but not cut out, everything else. There's no point in being strict cos you get bored and fall off the wagon pretty damn quickly, been there and got the t'shirt!

Target weight is back down to 14 stones and a 32" waist. I want to be able to do a full lap of Hamsterley Forest (oop North) on the bikes without stopping and/or getting completely breathless/fatigued (a lap of Innerleithen on the Scottish Borders however is a different kettle of fish!). That's gonna take some time.

All the best to you lot out there,


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